There’s a kind of silence that screams.

It doesn’t echo. It doesn’t cry out.
It just sits there, heavy, suffocating, a ghost in the lungs.
You know the one I’m talking about.

It visits at 3 a.m.
When the world is sleeping, and you’re awake. Not dreaming.
Just drifting.
And maybe tonight, you weren’t drifting. Maybe you were deciding.

Maybe you’ve been holding on by threads so thin, they don’t even feel real anymore.
Maybe you’ve rehearsed goodbyes in your head. Maybe you've already written them.
And maybe you're tired of people telling you to stay strong when you don't even feel real anymore.

If this is you....pause here.
Breathe.
Please read this slowly.
Because I wrote this for you.

💔 When It Feels Like You’re Disappearing

There’s a grief that isn’t about losing someone else.
It’s about losing yourself.

Your spark. Your joy. Your will to keep climbing out of bed.
You start to feel like a burden. A ghost in your own home.
People laugh in the next room, and you wonder how the sound of joy still exists in a world that’s grown so cold.

You smile. You nod. You lie.
“Yeah, I’m okay.”

But behind your eyes is a storm no one sees.
Behind your ribcage is a heart beating for a world you don’t feel connected to.
And sometimes, the idea of stopping, of letting go, of resting forever, feels like the only way to finally be free.

But here’s the truth:
You don’t want to die.
You just want the pain to stop.

And I get that. Oh, how I get that.

🌘 The Lie That Suicide Whispers

Suicide doesn’t come screaming.
It comes quietly, dressed in reason.
It tells you you’ve tried. That it’s hopeless. That nothing will ever change.
That the people you love will move on. That you’re doing them a favor.

It lies.

It doesn’t tell you that the pain is temporary, but death is not.
It doesn’t show you the sunrise you’ll miss next week, the one that turns the sky into rose gold.
It won’t mention the stranger you haven’t met yet, whose life you’ll save just by being you.
It won’t remind you that your absence would rip holes in hearts that would never truly heal.

No, suicide is a thief.
It robs you of every future version of yourself you haven’t met yet.
The you that laughs again. The you that writes again. The you that falls in love, or finishes the book, or simply sits in a garden one afternoon and feels... okay.

🕯 The Truth You Need to Hear

You are not too much.
You are not a failure.
You are not broken beyond repair.

You are a soul that’s been through hell and still wakes up to fight.
That’s not weakness. That’s holy resilience.
Even when your body feels like a cage and your mind won’t stop spiraling, 
Even when your past screams louder than your hope, 
You are still here.
That matters.

And no, I’m not going to sugarcoat it. Healing is hard.
Sometimes the world doesn’t get better overnight.
But you get better at surviving it.
And then one day, out of nowhere, you find yourself laughing.
Then crying because you thought you'd never laugh again.
Then breathing easier.
Then wanting to live.

You deserve to see that day.

🛑 If You’re Thinking About Ending It...Please Read This

Your pain is valid.
But it is not permanent.

You are allowed to scream.
You are allowed to cry.
You are allowed to take medication, go to therapy, text a hotline, or just sit in a friend’s car in silence.

But don’t you dare let this world erase you.

Not like this.

There is a future version of you who is rooting for you to hold on.
There is someone out there right now praying for someone just like you to stay.
And I’m writing this with shaking hands because I know, if you leave, you’ll never know what it was like to make it.

Stay.

Please, stay.

🌤 You Are Not Alone

Read that again: You. Are. Not. Alone.

I don’t care how messy your mind feels.
I don’t care how many mistakes you think disqualify you from joy.
You are worthy of help.
You are worthy of love.
You are still here, and that is a defiant, beautiful, middle-finger-to-the-darkness kind of miracle.

If all you do today is eat something and drink a glass of water, that’s enough.
If all you do is survive, that’s enough.
You don’t have to write the next chapter today.
Just don’t close the book.

📞 Need Help Right Now?

If you’re in the U.S., call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.
Available 24/7, free, confidential. You can also visit: https://988lifeline.org

If you're in another country, DM me or look up your local mental health services. I’ll help you find the number if you need it.

❤️ Final Words

You’re not weak for hurting.
You’re not broken for needing help.
You’re human. Beautifully, fiercely human.

The world may feel cruel.
But you, my friend, are a light in it.
And if that light has dimmed, that’s okay, 
It still burns.
And it will rise again.

Don’t give up.

Stay.

We need your story.
We need you.

— With all the love in the world,
Julia

Stay

When silence hums too loud to bear,
And shadows sit in every chair,
When breath feels sharp and hope feels thin,
And you can’t find a way back in...

Stay.

When every thought is lined with lead,
And ghosts are louder in your head,
When tears have names you never spoke,
And dreams have turned to ash and smoke...

Stay.

When nights are stitched with fraying thread,
And you're a stranger in your bed,
When joy is just a word they say,
And light feels miles and miles away...

Stay.

Not for forever—just tonight.
Just ‘til the edges dull their bite.
Just ‘til the ache begins to ease.
Just ‘til you can rise from your knees.

Stay for the sun you haven’t seen.
For fields you’ve yet to walk between.
For songs that haven’t touched your ears.
For quiet days that heal the years....

Stay, not because it all makes sense,
But simply for the consequence,
Of choosing one more fragile breath,
Of saying “no” to silent death.

You’re more than what the pain insists.
You’re more than trauma’s tightening fists.
You are a fire not yet out.
A whispered prayer. A sacred doubt.

So let the world keep turning slow.
Let morning come. Let kindness grow.
You don’t have to find your way,
Just rest.
Just breathe.
Just choose to stay.